I just realized something...

I have successfully passed and got over the "Beginning Period". Hui, did you realize that? We have successfully got over that hump of a beginnning!

All last summer, I would be so overwhelmed by anxiety whenever I thought about having to uproot the life I knew and was so familiar with to a place so foreign and unknown. A place that I would only be seeing for the first time the day I move in. I was dreading it so much. Thinking about my new apartment, my new roommate, and the whole unfamiliarity of it all was just too much and was taking a toll on everything! It is from all these feelings throughout the summer and throughout the beginning of this semester that I realized the fact that my stomach is actually able to "feel". Like really. My nervousness and anxiety made my stomach not want any food. It made my stomach crave for daddy's cooking just for a taste of familiarity and love. It tossed and turned and churned everything out too fast for normal. Then the beginning of the semester, it didn't feel hungry very much and food couldn't really satisfy it. Then, just recently, it started settling and being happy. It craves food and I actually wants to be full and content. Just like the state of self that I am in now. Content and comfortable.

I crossed that hump. Without even realizing that I have. There's no specific moment where you realize that you've crossed from the unknown to the known. Without even looking for the end of the bridge, you realize you're already there.

And that really feels good. It's always the crossing of the hump that is the most difficult. Reminder for me to tell myself that whenever I start anew, the beginning is always the hardest, after that, things do get easier and the unfamiliar becomes familiar. I don't know why moving to Lafayette, Indiana was so much harder than me studying abroad in China.